Sorry for the huge delay, my dear 5 readers. Mental health plus job hunting plus blog up-keep don’t always go well.
Here is the summary: Emily and Lorelai go on a spa day together, alone. Hilarity ensues. Rory plans to have a day home alone, uninterrupted by anyone. No one listens to her, and drama ensues. There are renovations happening at Luke’s diner (it’s been a while, but you remember Luke tearing a hole in the wall for Jess’ room? Well, that.) Dean begins getting a damn clue that Jess is way more fun than he is.
SPOILER ALERT. I have seen all the seasons before, so I am reviewing retrospectively. SPOILER ALERT.
And of course, Lor’s conversation with her mother:
Lorelai: (The spa) is the closest you’ll ever come to being a dog.
Emily: I beg you pardon?
Lorelai: You know, a whole life of nothing but eating, sleeping, lying on your back and getting rubbed.
Emily: I’d love the comparison to stop there.
Can I just take a moment to acknowledge how I’ve grown as a person, as a daughter? Watching this episode now, it makes me feel sad for Emily that Lorelai will go to such great lengths to avoid her mom at all times? In a TV show it is meant to be funny, but it is super mean. Why can’t they establish boundaries explicitly, saying “hey let’s do A, B, and C together and then X, Y and Z can be alone times?” OH RIGHT, ’cause they’re Gilmores. Like, we all know they are super different and all but, Lorelai has had 16 years out of her parents’ place: that’s plenty of time to grow up and get over that fact.
And honestly, if you look at the entire weekend, Emily is having a good time, and it is Lorelai’s reluctance to just make the best out of it that makes it shittier for her. I know this because I have been Lorelai. Look at Emily’s face when she talks about chatting during their pedicure! She is so excited to bond with Lor. And yes, bonding often involves grilling Lorelai about her personal life, but so does every parents’ idea of bonding. Pssshhht.
I love that they’re both really excited to get out of the spa to get a steak.
Lorelai: Come on, mom, what’s it going to be: Vicious Trollop, or the wide world of mung beans?
Is it just me or is every single bartender in this series called Steve? Was that on purpose?
That scene with Chad (the guy who asks Emily to dance) is tricky to me. For the first dance, Emily seemed to be having fun. The slow dance, not so much. (And like, what the fuck? That guy just grabbed Emily for the second dance and pulled her super close. Super normal for that type of bar? Maybe. Super sleazy? Absolutely) So, I guess, I understand Lorelai wanting her mom to have fun, but I also understand Emily being somewhat mad at Lorelai for pushing her. I would have kept an eye on Emily, if anything – girl-code 101, Lor, come on: you keep an eye on your friend’s face to see if she is uncomfortable, and if she is, you jump in.
But that blame game at the end? It breaks my heart. Everytime they are doing well, something happens and they bring eeeeeverything up again.
Emily: I want what you and Rory have. *sobs forever*
Rory wants an evening alone.
Ewwwww Dean and Rory kissing. They look like chickens.
Ohhkkkay. I get the pouty face about Rory wanting to spend a Dean-free night. I remember being a teenager. My only problem is Rory insisting if he is mad. Not because of Rory insisting, but it gives me the idea that Dean gets mad at that sort of stuff a lot. Also when Dean says “I am a saint, but I’m not mad.” Like, get the fuck out. Not being mad and respecting (which, spoiler! he does not) her girlfriend’s wishes to spend the night alone is being an average decent person. You don’t get a fucking cookie for that.
No one respects Rory’s time. No one. Not Lorelai, not her grandparents, not Paris, not Jess, not Dean. It upsets me more than I had realized. Everyone expects to decide over her time and if they don’t, they expect a huge apology from her. They totally take advantage of the fact that she is too nice to tell them all to fuck off.
I mean for both Lorelai and her grandparents we have the entire series as proof that they feel entitled to Rory’s time and undivided attention. Paris thinks that Rory’s desire to spend an evening doing laundry in her pijamas is not a valid reason to respect, because obviously her A- matters more than everyone’s time and space. Jess bringing food for Rory can be seen as sweet/ a dorky way to try and spend time with her OR as him not respecting Rory’s time and Rory’s hints that he should leave. You can see her discomfort with him staying, and his twisting her words in a creepy, arm-twisting way. Moreover, Rory is so uncomfortable she invites Paris to stay. That sounds an awful lot like when you get a friend to stay with you at a nightclub cause a guy is being pushy. And while we kind of know Jess just wanted to stay and chat with Rory, that doesn’t make it not-creepy behaviour.
(Side note: Isn’t Paris’ nanny Portuguese? why is Paris speaking broken Spanish to her? Portuguese =/= broken Spanish. What the hell.)
I am glad Paris stayed. First of all, because her face here is everything to me.
But also because I love the few conversations between Jess and Paris. Like I have said before, I wish they would have appeared together more. They disagree so much, but they’re both really smart, and get into awesome conversations with Rory as well.
Since then, I have wondered, would Jane Austen have liked Bukowski?
Like, seriously, what would Dean have said in that conversation?
“Uhhh, I really like Rory’s face when she reads, uuuhhh, I am taller than you, Jess. Uhhhhh.” Nothing worth listening to.
And then comes Dean to also not respect Rory’s boundaries and also ruining everything. Why are they in a relationship in which she doesn’t feel comfortable just saying NO (I know the answer is that they’re young and stupid) and why can’t he take a fucking hint (I know the answer is because he is Doormat Dean)?!
Jess: You really want me to go?
Rory: I really want to avoid a fight with Dean.
Danger, girl friend! DANGERRRRRR! If you are kicking out *friends* because your boyfriend gets his panties in a bunch with every dude that is anywhere near you, please run.
Dean’s angry scowl is so ridiculous. I don’t watch Supernatural, but I really hope Jared Padalecki has improved his acting skills since then.
But then he gets angry, storms into Rory’s house and starts yelling? I GET SO MAD AT THIS SCENE THAT I USUALLY FAST-FORWARD IT. He is so unreasonable and his paranoia doesn’t even make sense (like, what does he think is going on, with junk food, and Paris, right there? A food-play threesome scenario?), and he clearly has anger issues to work through. She has no reason to apologize for anything: not for wanting to be by herself (or even if she DID want to spend the night with Jess and Paris hanging out instead of with Dean), not for Paris showing up unannounced, not for Jess imposing himself on her plans, not for any fucking thing.And like, Rory saying Dean was justified in yelling, and asking Dean to stay for ice cream, and he still walks out all poutyfaced like he is the victim? It breaks my heart and makes me so mad. I think I dislike Rory sometimes in the same way that I dislike my past self. Which isn’t fair, to her or to myself. Real talk.
Paris, my sweet angel. You covered for Rory and saved her from the yelling doormat.
Paris: We’re friends?
Rory: I’m not sure if there’s an exact definition for what we are, but I do think it falls somewhere in the bizarro friends-ish realm.
You are officially friends! Femslash fic is in the making! Woohoo.
The episode ends with Dean creepily staring at Rory through the window, Lorelai acting as if Dean’s anger about the night before is justified, and them both saying “Rory would never lie” while looking at Rory laughing with Jess. Implying that Rory IS lying? To herself? I don’t understand.