It’s Lorelai’s birthday! Rory is planning a huge surprise party for Lorelai, for which she wants to break a record of some sort. Paris hesitates about going back to school after her meltdown at the bicentennial speech. Richard has a surprise for Lorelai.
SPOILER ALERT. I have seen all the seasons before, so I am reviewing with future events in mind. SPOILER ALERT.
Lorelai scared her parents into not even reacting about Yale. That’s how unreasonable she had been. I am glad they get over that quickly because they’re too cute to be holding back.
Tobin vs Michel
I had forgotten about Tobin! I kind of dislike his cutesy ways but mostly I dislike him because Michel does. Which is dumb, I know, but hey, TEAM MICHEL.
It’s funny to see Michel jealous about Lorelai liking Tobin better, because Michel is never actually nice to Lorelai (or anyone). He does his job and all, but he is not a friendly person. Tobin gets Lorelai Joe Strummer’s jacket! I would lose my shit.
It’s Lorelai’s birthday! Huzzah!
I appreciate Rory’s commitment to Lor’s birthday celebration. She has an entire week planned, along with a magnificent party with a gigantic pizza. Rory enlists friends and townspeople to do different things for the party. Lane picks a song from every year in Lorelai’s life! I remember watching that episode and thinking “I will do that when I turn 30”. I just need to remember this in five years.
It’s a very Luke thing to do, to offer handiwork as a birthday present. Goes hand in hand with my theory that Luke Danes is the Ron Swanson of Gilmore girls (or I guess the other way around, since Luke came first).
Lorelai: Where’s the french maid outfit I requested?
Luke: I got it all under the plaid.
Lorelai: What else is new?
Paris isn’t sure about the whole school thing
I have never had a meltdown recorded and broadcasted on C-Span, but I have had a public meltdown while in high school, and I remember the dread of going back to school, knowing everyone knows what happened. Everyone saw what happened to you. Gives me icky feelings just remembering. I feel for Paris.
And on top of that, she tries to get her nose pierced and ends up being allergic to the thing and had to spend the night at a hospital.
Richard has a surprise for Lorelai
Richard decided to celebrate Lorelai’s birth by making an investment in her name. I can totally see him doing that. And now Lorelai gets $75,000. Good job, Richard. It is also a really Richard thing to do. I like character consistency.
Luke is meeting Nicole’s parents, and Jess isn’t going to school
Luke: If I sit down are we gonna have the conversation?
Nicole: Luke, please.
Luke: Okay, here comes the conversation.
Okay. I know it’s played as a cute, quirky Grumpy Luke thing, but like, step the fuck up. Adults have conversations. About things. Jesus.Thankfully Jess jumps in to tell him to, umm, step the fuck up.
Following that sort of half-ass conversation with Nicole, Luke sees Jess get into his car (so, not to school). Oh Jess. Then Luke follows him and sees he’s been going to Walmart to work extra hours instead of going to school. Oh Luke.
Jess says he has everything under control. The delusionally overconfident white boy shines through. I love you, but you’re an idiot, Jess. I feel bad for him (I am biased, I know). He really did think he had it covered, going to school almost never, working full-time to be able to get out of there as soon as possible.
Luke has a fit in front of Nicole’s parents. And then, instead of confronting Jess about it in a more serious and definitive way, Luke “steals” (hides) Jess’ car. I cackle every time I see this part, because, WHO DOES THAT? Oh, Luke.
Luke looks proud of himself that Jess had to go to school because he doesn’t have a car. What the fuck, Luke?! That is super condescending and not okay at all to do, and if Jess was going to go to Walmart that day and didn’t show up last-minute, he could get fired. Also not okay at all. Fucking hell. I hadn’t realized just how actually terrible their relationship is in many ways. Most people talk about how Jess is a jerk to Luke – which is true, 100% – and how Luke always tried, but let’s look at a couple of things okay? Having half-ass conversations with Jess, throwing him into a lake, acting like he is an accident waiting to happen, stealing his car… this isn’t trying. Or if it is, it is a kinda shitty job at trying. I guess it’s still better than giving up on him altogether which seems to be what Liz (Jess’ mom) did, but jeez.
Oh boy, OH BOY. I had forgotten about the friday night dinner
How did Lorelai think giving a check to Emily paying her back for Chilton was gonna go? Seriously. It is a difficult thing because I would have also wanted to give my parents back the money they lent to me, but I would have waited a little perhaps. Or would have done it another way, showing a bit more good faith (in terms of: I’m still going to dinners with you, I am not here only for your money). Maybe that’s just me? This goes back to the question of how bad things were when Lor lived in that house. There is never any mention of anything terrible happening beyond “Emily and Richard are stuffy rich people who were suffocating Lor’s liberal ways”. So to be so insensitive to her parents seems awfully petty of Lorelai.
Like, paying back the loan I totally get. But she could have done it a thousand different ways, on a thousand different occasions that would have been better than that.
Lorelai also keeps saying that she wants Rory to have a warm and fuzzy relationship with her grandparents but she keeps putting a whole lot of emotional labor on Rory, who is always caught in the middle.
At least the episode ends with a huge pizza descending and a banner saying “Happy birthday, Lorelai.” That’s happy.