This is the nth time I am watching this, and I am still beyond excited about Rory’s first day at Yale. Lor is helping Rory move all her stuff to Yale, and end up making a million trips back and forth. Lorelai can’t drive stick, Rory runs into a familiar face at the dorms, Nicole’s lawyers visit Luke about the divorce. Rory has a fun first night in university in the end.
SPOILER ALERT. I have seen all the seasons before, so I am reviewing with future events in mind. SPOILER ALERT.
Rory: Should I hold a sign?
Lorelai: Or you could do the “going off to college” walk.
Rory: The what?
She drives Luke’s truck (filled with Rory’s stuff) in reverse all the way to the diner. That can’t be safe, but it’s funny as hell.
Lorelai: This is a misogynistic truck.
Lorelai: It’s anti-woman, it’s gender-selective! It’s *fake bro voice* “Oh, let’s drink a beer and watch the game and hike our shorts up!”
Luke: You said you could drive stick.
Lorelai: Yeah, not the Joe Six-Pack of sticks. Not the *fake bro voice* “Ooh, let’s scratch our bellies and eat some corn nuts and pick our teeth!”
Lorelai is everything. And so is the whole ordeal with the gross Yale mattress.
Rory moves to Yale!
Oh my. This brings me back to me moving in the dorms at Concordia. Such exciting times. How does the orientation girl get to Rory’s name so quickly? I am betting Yale gets TONS of new students. Anyway.
I remember being Rory when I started university. I wanted to get everything right, read every manual, get to places hours before. That quickly washed off, of course. But I still remember.
Do over! You missed the moment!
Later on, Lor freaks out because there is tons of stuff they are missing for Rory’s room. So she goes off to do some errands. Copper Boom!
After Lor leaves the second time, Rory freaks out and pages her to get back because she misses her already. So Lorelai drives back. Awwwh.
The suitemates, and the first night at Yale
First, we meet Tana Schrek. I love her. She clearly has social anxiety and tries her best and has developed ways to exist and be social and I love that. Also, she is turning sixteen the following weekend. How much would I be freaking out if I were to be starting Yale at age 16? I don’t want to know.
Lorelai: Maybe she’s lost.
Rory: Or maybe she’s one of my new suitemates who I’m already off to a swell start with.
Lorelai: Do you know how vulnerable you are to venereal disease?
Rory: …All hail to the queen of the non-sequiturs.
“You’re supposed to carry a whistle, a flashlight, a crucifix and a loaded glock with you at all times.”
But then, thennnnnnn, we meet a second suitemate. Paris Geller arrives in the dorm. She is Rory’s roommate. Paris’ life coach said Paris and Rory’s journey was not done (I agree, excellent point, Terrance) so Paris’ dad made a call. Now, I like this in a fictional universe because Paris is lovely and their friendship is important to me. But Paris surprising Rory with it instead of consulting with her is coercive and not cool.
I don’t like how Lor and Rory seem to mock Paris’ life coach. He is trying to help Paris and it is apparently useful for her. Good for Paris.
They order SO SO SO MUCH take-out. Who is even paying for that much take-out, honestly? They are setting the food by geographical placement, like an Ivy League-er would. And, of course, Lorelai invites all the girls to come in and try take-out, while hanging out and singing. I know this (the mom starting a laid back party “for” her daughter) flies and is perfectly cool in this world, but I wonder if it would be in an actual university dorm setting.
Rory: We are four people, and we’ve ordered for like, four hundred.
Lorelai: So what you’re saying is… you want to crank it up, you want to set it off, you want to put a match to the keg and burn this mo’ fo’ down?
They end the night howling back at some dudes howling from the dudes’ dorm buildings. As one does.
Luke is trying to get a divorce
I don’t know how divorces work, but isn’t there an easier way than “Have your lawyer call my lawyer”? Poor Luke. He just wants to get away from all of that and all these suits keep popping up in his diner. And like, they keep accusing Luke of wanting something out of Nicole. This is probably Nicole talking, because if she could just tell them to give it a rest and signed whatever she needed to sign, they would not be grilling Luke. Either that, or she does not care enough to talk things through with Luke.
Luke: This is Lorelai.
A lawyer (to Lor): Are you an attorney?
Luke: No, she’s carbon-based.
I love snarky Luke. He ends up telling them that he does want something. He wants the hours he wasted watching an act of musical drinking glasses back. He literally says this to the lawyers. He is such a beautiful man.
The episode ends with Rory starting her first day at Yale with some good coffee, and Lorelai coming home to a Rory-less house. Awwwh.