Today I (re)watch: Gilmore girls, 5.14

The aftermath of the vow-renewal drama: Luke and Lorelai are broken up now, for sure. Rory visits Stars Hollow after a chill hangout with Logan + friends. There is also a pancake party for girls and dolls at the Dragonfly.

SPOILER ALERT. I have seen all the seasons before, so I am reviewing with future events in mind. SPOILER ALERT

Rory organized a funeral for a caterpillar. Why didn’t we get a flashback of that? That is so cute. Irrelevant to almost any plot point I can think of, but fucking adorable.

Luke needs time to process
This is hard. We know nothing happened between Chris and Lorelai, but Luke doesn’t know that. And Luke is a jealous twat, too, so that doesn’t help. It also doesn’t help that Lorelai didn’t tell him before it happened, or right after. Breaking up seems harsh, especially without any conversation whatsoever, Luke just shuts off and leaves. Very healthy communicator, this guy.
I get the “needing time to process” thing, though, I guess. Not for that reason, but sometimes I am a slow processor of feelings, too. I am just not a jealous, angry dickface. Like, the reason Lor hid the drunk night with Chris was because she was afraid of Luke getting jealous and car-kicking. Not to say it was right that she hid it, but I get it.

Lorelai tells Luke that she didn’t see it coming, what Chris said and did while drunk at the wedding, and Luke responds that she should have. Really, Luke? How? How could anyone see it coming that Emily would convince (I mean, convince is a strong word, and takes responsibility off Chris to know better, as he should have) Chris to be the worst asshole ever – the fact that she later not only forgives Chris but (SPOILER) marries him is beyond me, I swear – and that they would catch Rory making out and they would all have an argument? HOW?!
On the one hand, Luke is right that Lorelai would probably not cut out Christopher or Emily out of her life, but Lorelai could make them listen and back off. On the other hand, I don’t exactly blame him for wanting out of a family in which your mother-in-law pulls such disgusting, manipulative stunts on your relationship.

All this said, when a person tells you they need time to process, pressuring is not just disrespecting their boundaries, but also probably gonna backfire. Like it does for Lor. She presses on things and so he breaks things off. And Taylor has already given out a thousand blue and pink ribbons (in support of Lor or Luke, of course) by now, probably.

Of girls and dolls
A woman is planning a brunch party with 6 little girls and their dolls and Michel is losing it.
Michel: Teeth, throat, colons, they don’t have those either – unless they are brides of Chucky.
Lorelai: Not paying attention to you anymore.

After this, at the inn, Lor tells Sookie about what happened with Luke. I like how it’s a running gag that Sookie is kind of bad at comforting Lorelai, saying things that are actually depressing, or going on a tangent about cooking techniques, or something. She tries, though, and she makes shit up to make it all better. Sookie is super underrated, I swear.

Rory later reports to Lorelai – who didn’t make it to the doll party due to heartbreak – that Michel apparently saved the day, and the party. I would have loved to see that.

Logan will not call
At age 20, I wouldn’t have called either, if I had been interrupted from hooking up by a mom, a dad and mom’s boyfriend. To be honest. But, at age 20, I would have probably be sad if a guy didn’t call, too. Maybe. I don’t know. I was a very cynical 20 year old, assuming guys were dicks and just riding that dick wave along with them.

xxx

Ughhhh here it comes again, the lazy writing of secondary female characters. Why does everyone who is not Rory, Lor or their friends have to be a one-dimensional idiot?! Paris and Rory need dating advice, so they enlist Althea and Janet to help them during breakfast, and Paris calls them idiots who can do dating. First of all, how cliche and 1980s do you have to be to still reinforce the idea that you can either be smart, or good at dating?! And, I mean, they’re at Yale. Not to say they are geniuses if they are at Yale, but they cannot be braindead either. You can do Ukranian politics *and* have a basic understanding of gender relations and flirting. Paris has a lot of internalized misogyny going on, and so do the writers.

Rory follows Althea & Janet’s advice to call Logan herself and casually ask to hang out, and to show up looking casual but hella hot. The problem with this word and with being vague when your expectations are specific, is that you may be disappointed. She asks to hang out that same night, and Logan is having poker night and invites her over. She is confused and disappointed. I mean, many of us have been here, so there is no judgment.

They talk later, though, and I love it. Logan is relatively good at this, and clear. ‘Hang out’ IS vague, and he chose between not seeing her because he had a thing or seeing her while the thing was happening. It makes sense, so they agree there wasn’t a problem. And they agree to hang out one-on-one after he gets back from a trip.

Lorelai is down, Rory to the rescue!
Sookie calls Rory to come take care of Lor, who is in bed crying, and Logan offers Rory his car and driver to take her to Stars Hollow. She arrives to the house to see her mom devastated, crying in bed, saying the entire town hates her and Luke hates her and how she screwed everything up. Oh man, this is so so painful to watch. I get so mad at Emily and Christopher every time I watch this. They claim to love Lorelai, but continue to cause her pain every other day.

And then, OH MY GOD. That dream. Lorelai has a dream in which she walks down the stairs and it’s the Black White and Red theatre and Luke is there. Like the day before, Lor asks him what they’re watching and he replies the same thing, “Something stupid.” The movie? Their first date, when Luke says he is “all in” and Lor doesn’t say anything. Watching this in the movie, theatre Lorelai urges movie Lorelai to say something. Instead, movie Lorelai just wanders off with her eyes, and Luke backs out a little. Theatre Lorelai repeats: Say Something, but this time, there is a blue ribbon where theatre Luke was sitting.

My heart, it hurts.

I am absolutely in love with how much Rory is there for her mom. I mean, she always is, but in this episode, we see her giving zero fucks about anything else. She is ready to fight. She takes Logan’s car, Frank (Logan’s driver), and calls Lane up. They do groceries, take Taylor’s stupid ribbons (what kind of douchebag would throw a break-up in everyone’s face like that? fuck Taylor), demand that people (who incidentally happens to be Luke) stop honking at them.

As soon as Rory leaves, Lor goes back to blob mode, which is natural. But then she leaves a thousand messages on Luke’s machine, decides it’s too much, and goes to his apartment to delete them. Oh boy. I love her and want to hug her so tight. Even like 10 years after the show is done, I want to hug Lauren Graham, to thank her for making me cry.

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