Today I (re)watch: Gilmore girls, 5.18

It’s been a long, long hiatus. But we are back in business.
An old townsperson dies and leaves his big house to the town, which is converted to a museum of “might have happened” historical items. Luke helps Taylor with the museum, to everyone’s surprise. Logan hasn’t called Rory, and Doyle has not called Paris, and Lane thinks Zack is cheating, so the gals get drunk together. Kirk is still looking for a place to stay, and Lorelai overshares about her family issues on an interview for the inn.

SPOILER ALERT. I have seen all the seasons before, so I am reviewing with future events in mind. SPOILER ALERT

Mr Twickum’s museum
Mr Twickum dies and donates his house to the town, along with allegedly historical items, and asks for his place to be converted to a museum. The items are hilarious: a letter that might have been from someone who might have been related to a former president, a flag that might have belonged to a person who might have been important somewhere, etc. Luke decides to help build and set it up, though, and no one understands why he is doing this. He tells Lorelai that he knew Mr Twickum because the man was like a second father to him. But later on he tells Taylor that he is volunteering to help because Lorelai asked him to. No one knows why he is doing it until later in the episode. So I will keep the mystery for now too. Taylor is obviously suspicious of Luke’s motives too but he makes Luke his right hand man, even if Luke did try to behead Taylor with a frying pan. Which is hilarious and I wish we could have seen it. Seeing Luke biting his tongue and being super uncomfortable around Taylor bossing him around in his very specific, peculiar, unique way of doing things is super fun though.

The museum is so very Stars Hollow. It is cute, and cheesy, and all of the artifacts in it are historically insignificant: a collection of maybe-someone-famous-had-a-relative-who-might-have-written-this-letter type of things. A 48-star flag they got from Sears, a cannonball that belonged to some unknown and then was lent to another unknown and then transported to the museum, not without breaking the floor and ending up in a hole which you need a flashlight to look into. Classic Stars Hollow. And a history which puts creationism and evolution on equal level, completely ignores Native Americans, and makes up shit as they go along. Classic ‘Murica.

Also part of the museum. Spooky.

Lorelai’s interview
The Dragonfly Inn gets the attention of a magazine, and they want to do an interview with Lorelai. In the interview, her upbringing is touched upon as a side comment by the interviewer, and Lorelai starts cracking a million jokes about her mother being comparable to Stalin and the like, in classic Lorelai fashion. This is not only offensive and inaccurate, all she says, but also extremely petty and unreasonable and unprofessional to do. Does she not realize she is talking to an interviewer? Does she not realize her mother could read this, and that she has feelings? Does she not think that the interview should center the inn and the work she has put into it, and not her “rich kid who doesn’t want to be rich” sob story? Does she not notice how ridiculous she sounds, a thirty-something talking about her mom like she is an angsty teenager? Honestly.
I have talked before about how her upbringing might not have been warm and fuzzy, but there is no indication that there was ever abuse. Toxic relationships, bad communication, huge incompatibilities in character, tastes, goals. All of that, yes. Serious abuse, neglect or unquestionably bad parenting? Hardly. It just seems super ridiculous, unnecessary and mean to me.

In any case, Lor gets her shit together, realizes that that article should not be printed, and tells the magazine to throw it all out.

The sisterhood of the travelling heartache. And Kirk.
Rory and Paris are both in a bit of a dry spell (as in, the boys they are into are not calling, for one reason or another) and so instead of being “pathetic” and sitting alone watching TV, they decide to go to Stars Hollow for the weekend. They are both staying at Lorelai’s… and so is Kirk. His living situation is still uncertain so he is staying on the couch.

Paris: How old is he (Kirk)?
Rory: You’d have to cut him open and count the rings.

They all have breakfast like Lor has three children and make plans for the weekend, while Paris mocks Rory for being super sensitive about getting any calls (from Logan) at all. She does not.

Lorelai: The grand opening of the Stars Hollow museum is this morning — any takers?
Paris: It’s always amusing when provincials grasp for legitimacy. I’m in.

They meet up with Lane at the museum opening, and Lane is mopey because Zach lied to her about where he was the night before and she then saw him head out of Sophie’s (music) shop later, so she thinks they are having an affair. So they’re a fun group. And like a fun group of college gals, they decide to drink, and Patty’s leftover punch (famous for its ridiculous amount of alcohol) is there for them.

Lane: I’m getting to the bottom of this.

Lane goes and confronts Sophie, who shows her that Zack was lying… about being in a bluegrass band. Zack has embarassed so he hadn’t told Lane. So that’s settled.
Paris, although she swears to Rory that she won’t call Doyle, runs around Stars Hollow drunk, without her shoes on (because she left them with Rory to ensure she wouldn’t go far), trying to get some change to call from a payphone (because she gave Rory her cellphone). Poor thing.
Rory sort of holds it together but ends the episode crying on the bathroom floor – presumably alternating between that and throwing up – on Lorelai’s lap, asking why Logan doesn’t like her. Ohhh man. I remember that kind of heartache when I was in college. Feeling like every mediocre boy that doesn’t call is the end of the world. It is the worst.

During the episode, Luke had run into Dean a few times and had seemed pissed for no reason, all angsty and being his usual worst so finally Luke confronts him. What was up, you ask? He is still the worst, he is still bitter about Rory, and he is bitter that Luke is still with a Gilmore girl and he is not. Ruh-roh. I get what he is saying about Rory moving on from Dean, and yeah, that sucks (especially because he is not wrong, that she was attracted to fancy, rich Logan, leaving small-town Dean behind), but being bitter with Luke? That’s such a silly thing to me. He remains the worst, is what I’m saying.

So, wait, what is the actual reason Luke was helping out with the museum?
*drum-roll please*
He would like to buy the house off of the town after the two months of museum time are done. For him and Lorelai. That’s a big-ass house for only two people. Even if they had kids, they would have to have like ten children. In any case, it’s a thing he wants and it’s sweet. Lorelai and Luke talk a little bit about how big and pretty the house is. It’s cute.

Next up, Rory tells Logan she cannot do ‘casual’, and Sookie needs bed rest which changes things up for a lot of people. We are near the end of season 5!

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